10.19.2010

(a letter to my unborn son)


My sweet, sweet baby Jack,

Today marks two weeks before your supposed due date, and surprisingly you are peacefully sleeping right now in my belly. Dad and I have this odd suspicion that you’ll be born early, but perhaps not. If you’re impatient like me you’ll come tonight, but Dad thinks you like your cozy, warm uterus too much.

I am so excited to meet you. I feel you kick and squirm and hiccup so much inside of me. I can already tell you will have the same energy and excitement for life as your Dad (who, for the record, has already called dibs on holding your hand first). Though I can’t see or touch you, it is crazy to think how much I love you already. I’m sorry I have complained so much being pregnant with you. Will you forgive me? Can I take it all back? If I could just hold you and get to know you for a few short moments, I would never complain again. Your birth would be a breeze because I’d know it would all be worth it to see you again.

Sometimes I am worried you won’t like me, or that I won’t be a good Mom. But then I am reminded that you are a precious child that will be coming to us straight from our Heavenly Father’s arms, and that with your father, I can do this. We have prepared our entire lives for this moment of becoming parents. You and I still have the hard task of labor and birth ahead of us, but remember that you’re not alone. We can do it together, and it will bring us even closer. Your dad and I will be with you every step of the way.

It is hard to imagine just how much our lives will change when you arrive. Sometimes when I think we are ready, I get scared because we have never experienced anything like this before. Dad and I love each other very much already, and to think about that love multiplying times infinity seems unreal to me. I can’t imagine loving you and Dad even more than I do right now, but people tell me it is possible.

Jack, I’m not a brave or courageous person. I can probably count on one hand the number of risks I have taken in my life. You are one of them. But I am glad your Dad and I took the risk of starting a family, and I feel so blessed that you will finally be joining us soon. You have brought out the best in us, Jack, and I know you will continue to do so for the rest of your life. We are so delighted and nervous at the same time to meet you. I hope you know that despite my shortcomings, I will do my best to give you the world. We love you, baby boy.

Love,
Mom

4 comments:

Kamie said...

Oh my I just got chills. You are going to be such a wonderful mother. You're baby boy is very very lucky. And you're right... my love for Ari is more than I could have even thought possible. I'm so excited for you. You are so strong!

Sarah Ray said...

Beautifully said. I bet he cant wait to read this when he is older. Im excited to meet him!!
-Sarah Ray

kwistin said...

Oh, Alie. This almost made me cry.

What a lovely little letter for baby Jack. From this note alone, I can tell--you're already a good Mother. I'm so proud of you, and so excited to meet him. :)

Lauren's blog said...

This is the sweetest letter I've ever read.